bfg on getting used to things being smaller

Today sent out an email to family and friends with a link to my Picasa album of all the juicy things I am selling.
Many are so surprised that I am selling my laptops for a netbook.

The answer is I need to get used to smaller.

As an honourary giant, I have certain privileges in life. I was never a delicate walker for instance - instead I bulldoze ahead. Some people think its rude but the really small kids that I run over I often don't even see in my hurry and long shadow.

But this has been a privilege. I am going off to a place where space is limited and where my height which here is passably tall will be extremely noticeable (so I am told). I need to get used to it.

I am soooo excited to get rid of my stuff. It's time for a fresh start even if it will be a tough one.

In other updates, today via email I got my Pre-Orientation Schedule from JET. It turns out they are going to host 4 hr/week Japanese language lessons at McGill! How awesome is that! I am so excited - it will be so good to get into a grove. I am lost without a classroom. It is like a sailor with no boat. Pathetic but the presence of a teacher and the fear of disappointing them really moves me forward.

In June there is also a karaoke get together where I will meet other MTL JET Short-Lister's and Alternates! Again, amazing.

with that I sign off - returning to my craig's list frenzy.
Here is the link to my album in case you did not already know: http://picasaweb.google.ca/vgiovanna/MovingCallsForAFreshStart?feat=directlink

bfg on no being the new yes

The past two days haven't been easy.

Still, I am going to take the advice of L from work and start with the good news.

I did get my leave of absense from work! That means when/if I return from Japan in a year my job will still be waiting for me. Hopefully, I will be able to either get a teaching position at a CEGEP or upgrade to a position that requires more than ten percent of my brain space. Don't get me wrong - my job has been perfect for my needs right now. I required something that left me stress-free at the end of the day to go to school but still paid me decent enough to live. But it is not challenging nor does it use any of my many god-given talents...  I want wake up in the morning and love what I do. Hopefully, Japan will be a time like that.

More good news is that the criminal record papers are in so technically JET Consulate has everything they need from me to send me over to the big J. The coordinator even confirmed on the phone that she was looking at all the docs right then. I do have to send them a copy of my renewed passport (since mine expires in early 2011 before I would get back) but that is not required for now. No - I can now sit back (figurativly) and wait for my Pre-Orientation package and the big Contract.

And just now I finished with the roomie TM and the bf Ant to take pics of all the oh-so-many items I am selling: electronics, furniture, small appliances and knick-nacks. I love selling stuff not just for the extra money but because I physically feel like I am loosing weight. I watch some stranger come in my house and carry out that table or the big desk and it feels so fresh. This is going to feel good.

Whatever I am keeping is partly going to the bfs and in part going to my Nonnina's garage. Last time I stored all my books there, she would call me when she thought I was being "bad" and threaten to burn them. So in order to decrease the threat's sting (she never did it though but still she has the power to), I sent out an email to close, trusting friends offering to lend out books from my library for a year. I hope people take me up on it  since it means my babies will be loved and cared for while I am gone. Everytime I pack a box of books I can't help but feel a little guilty at hiding its awesomeness from the world for my convenience.

Alas, the past 48 hrs haven't been so upbeat.

I don't want to go into the details mostly because it is so confusing. The big stick-in-the-ass was when I discovered that the Government Student Loan doesn't GIVE me a bursary, they pay that amount to themselves. In the end, it is still good - there is less money for me to pay back to them but I was counting on that for my Japan fund.

I have a perhaps unfounded fear of being stuck in Japan with no money. It scares the begezzes out of me. So I am trying super hard to surpass the JET recommendation of $2,700 and hit at least 3K.

So this news set me on the panicking mode which makes me far from the best of company.

Basically, I just spent hours on the phone calling banks and government offices and other big authoritative institutions that had me on hold for way too long and refused to take responsibility for their inaction or actions. It was frustrating but with these things you just have to grind your teeth and smile. They may not see your smile but let me tell you something for free - they hear it.

Its getting late and I still have lots of things on my list I need to check off. It's been a long day so I think will just leave it at that...

bfg stays awake by the shear anticipation of completing another check-list item.

bfg on envelope etiquette

I came home early today. And there, on my kitchen table was a crisp white envelope containing my criminal record check from the police station.

That document cost me $85.oo so you better believe I want to make sure that I do this right.

The last bit of paperwork that JET needs from me is a "Vulnerability Check" - it means that I have not been convicted of a crime or involved in any activity while I have been in Canada that would lead someone to believe that I am a potential threat to youths. Obviously, these people haven't been to my Sunday sermons.

I called Tania G., the JET Coordinator for the Montreal Consulate. I try very hard NOT to call the Consulate because I can only imagine how many they get an hour. A hundred? But considering what was at stake I decided to bother her and ask if I am allowed to open the envelope and make photocopies as back-ups. It turns out it was aye-okay and I did just that. Piece of advice: anything you paid for, photocopy. How often have people lost the doc, never received it or just can't read it... and then in comes Nessa waving the photocopies and proofs saying "Oh no! You got this." Trust me, it will save your ass. All you need is a beautiful black filing cabinet like mine to organize it all in. A worthy investment since only important people have filing cabinets and shredders - true story.

There is something to be said about a crisp piece of paper all stamped and shiny the way paper does that says I am a good person. Not nice, but good. I haven't killed anyone, or hurt them in any way that has been a detriment to society. I think once I come back from Japan I may frame my photocopy and put it in my entrance or something.

Something else though... one pieces of 8x11 inch paper drove me crazy: had me go to 2 police stations, call 3 centres, borrow the car with the bf, wait in line for 40 mins, stress for 3 weeks and bite my nails... all over this itty bitty piece of paper. Puts things into perspective - I need to get a life.

bfg returns to calming yoga tactics.

bfg on wrinkles

One thing I love about blogging is that you naturally start to browse other people's sites to see what is on their radar and, especially when it comes to reading about current JETS, how they are dealing with the recent turn of events in their lives. In many ways, I started this blogging adventure so I can record my inconsistent thoughts as well as potentially help others in the future. And maybe you all will learn a little more about my great love, Japan, in the process.

Now for anyone who knows me, I have always been into healthy skin care; I wear sunblock all year round, never tan and avoid the beach like the plague (though that has more to do with not getting sand in my ass, but anyways). I also try my best to avoid squinting and frowning, often hearing the opening page to The Princess Bride in my head when Adela loses her beauty as she devotes too much time to fretting about the loss of her youth; the wrinkling of her brow led to worry lines and creases abound.

I write this because a small, very small, part of me is starting to worry.

Oh, don't get me wrong I am excited. But there have been some critiques of JET - very vague ones - that have preoccupied me since I started asking around about the program.

At a birthday party last June when I mentioned in conversation how I was thinking of teaching in Japan through JET a friend of the bf bellowed, "JET sucks." And though he had several other very imaginative adjectives to add, his complaint lacked any substance to sway me.

But I have since encountered similar persons and it has been frustrating. The most concrete critique has been the lack of organization. Too date though, I have been amazed at how JET, especially the MTL Consulate who I have had the most direct contact with, has been able to coordinate everything with such precision, albeit giving themselves a significant amount of time to complete tasks; it took 10 weeks for them to provide answers of JET acceptance after the interview! Still, they have been responsive, responsible and informative. At my interview, they said they would mail all answers on April 12th. April 14th I had my response in my mailbox - lovely. The best part was me being able to tell people that - when I came back to work from lunch that day, everyone asked me and I had the letter in my hand ready to share it with them (and all who would listen in this universe). I squealed all afternoon and the girls and Brian were kind enough to tolerate this (and still do).

Other blogs have posted that there are significant differences between job experiences: some schools give you the freedom to create your own lesson plan while others have you there to replace the tape-recorder. I can understand and empathize with that but I don't think it is the fault of JET in the least (unless there is some information I am missing) and seems to have more to do with circumstance than anything else. To be honest, am really scared of being in such a position where I have no creative freedom - not even a little - in the classroom but there is still a big as to whether that challenge will even be mine to face so I will set aside the pacing and handle the issues that I can for now.

To be frank, I have found that JET has been really generous to date with their time and efforts. Though at times curt and somewhat cut throat - they only gave Short-Listed JETs TEN DAYS to do all the medical tests and send in proper documentation for acceptance, my guess is that they have to be to weed out the people who just want a trip to Japan and keep the applicants who are going first to teach, than to learn.

Anyways, all my fears are overshadowed by my excitement at meeting my students. Geez, I am in love with them already. And hopefully, a firmer, clearer image of what to expect will start to form once the much anticipated contract arrives in two weeks.

Tomorrow - spring cleaning and the commencement of selling all my possessions until am nothing but a serf ready for grand Pacific adventures.

bfg on burning her budget

You know when you say (or in this case write) something and then you throw it all to hell right after?

lunch with Gabsters: $16
purchasing all of GG Kay's books to get signed plus 1 edition of YASABEL for one of my students: 82$
drink at hotel pre-reading/signing of Kay: $10
drinks for moi and said awesome author post reading & signing: **

So I went about $100 over my budget - after having JUST blogged about me being a frugal woman.

Was it worth it? Absolutely. Four of us got to sit at a table and see the man behind some of the most beautifully written works of literature out there. He is a private man, so I won't share the details but he said something that resonated inside of me; about how there is this space between what we think up in our heads and our capability to produce what we imagine. I have held back from writing often because once I sit down and stare at the screen my fingers, my very body seems unworthy of the story that needs to be told. And so I jot it in my little book and leave it there to live without disappointment.

I also got to spend time with E, a friend from other Cons and author events, and I met two of her good friends one of which is an ESL teacher that gave me plenty of advice. E & I seem to share the same taste in literature which makes her an instant friend. It was interesting to see how each one of us interacted with GGK's books; we all agreed on loving the writing but it seems the "star" quality is different for each. I can honestly write that the second best thing other than reading a book, and at times it is the best, is talking about them. And E was there during the Kafflelache for GGK during Worldcon so that was like a reunion - just replace the coffee for Coke and Rum! (Oh WorldCon, how I love thee!)

The other thing is because I had a stack for him to sign it allowed me to make conversation which then allowed me to, of course, mention that I am leaving for Japan. It turns out that an acquaintance who a) loves books b) especially loves YA books and c) has just completed their Master's and unsure whether they should continue is going through JET as well. Honestly, it clicked and I haven't even met them.

I love that about life. The way things fit together sometimes. So screw you 100$ I am HAPPY I spent you - it was all worth it. Memories to savor when I curl up with a book and maybe a JET partner, potential friend, to do mini-trips with combing the used bookstores for GGK books in Japanese. Thank you Fates! At times, you are kind.

bfg goes to curl up with a book staring adoringly at her new tomes in the meantime. happy reading!

bfg on budget 2010-2011

In many ways, this post is a sequel to my one on list making.

Fact is, I love spending money. I love buying people presents and have someone else wrap them. I adore spending money on rounds - be it of shots or books. I think its a healthy relationship the one I have with money... I want to make lots of it and spend even more!- am no Henry Potter.

So a budget for going to Japan is necessary. I can honestly see myself walking into a stationary store, see ChocoCat stuff and ship 1K worth of goodies back to my nephew for safekeeping until my return. Japanese Consulate recommends that this year JETs bring 2,700.00 Canadian dollars with them. Since we are only paid at the end of every month, for August we need to fend for ourselves.

The reality of the situation is that everything depends on your contract.

Though my income is guaranteed - all JETs are paid the same annual salary - each contract is unique. Some school offer positions with room, board and even transport to and from work. Other times, your rent is partially covered and/or you are asked by the city to teach at several schools. Sometimes you get zilch. So you may need 3K in the end or, as my thesis advisor keeps saying, get by with 1K "just fine" it all depends on the contract...

The Consulate mails out the contract at around mid-May so I will have a better idea of how much to bring. I am determined to save at least three thousand and with my tax cheque I should make my goal (yeah!). But it is quiet possible that I will use about a third of it. Granted, my supervisor told me the other night that "Japan is a book lovers paradise" so I am really going to have to contain myself.

It's not just that though. I am going to Japan people. J-A-P-A-N. And that means, I need to go dressed in style so yeah new clothes, a few new pairs of (walking and work) shoes. Definitely need cute rain-boots. Let us not forget the fact that I am going there to teach so the short skirts won't do - I will have to stock up on "professional" knee length. Being a giant, from their perspective, means my abilities to restock the wardrobe are dismal. So lots to purchase folks. Lots.

Hence, my budget.

Because, lets face it, I like to spend money remember. And if I don't walk in with a checklist composed away from tempting items which outlines what I am allowed to buy and how much I am allowed to spend, well things can get seriously out of hand. I can totally convince myself that PUKA slippers priced 40$ are a necessity for me to bring there. Really, I can.

In my defense, I am pretty good at keeping to budget. It's like a Convenant between Shopzilla-Nessa with Sergent-Nessa. But I am also very imaginative at reading the budget law in an imaginative way; a.k.a Law-&-Order-Nessa. Ex.: Guidebook is on my list. Now, it is singular but I am already shopping and it looks like I will be purchasing three (Tokyo, Kyoto and all of Japan). But while "window" shopping at lunch I saw Kyoto and Tokyo Moleskine City books that were just too sexy. they were calling my name, chanting that they were 20% off and I just HAD. To. HAVE. Them. And since "guidebook" in on the list and there is no specification of quantity and I am only slightly over budget...

They are really beautiful though.

Last night, A (the bf) and I passed by Future Shop. I wonder if I should wait to buy a net-book in Japan or if I should just get them here. Super prices and since A is insisting on purchasing an iPad and new laptop I am sure I can discount it - i wonder what are the bargaining techniques in JP?!

I am starting to feel like this blog post sounds like it comes from a Kinsella novel.

bfg on "the end"

I submitted my last paper for the semester. Here is hopin'.

I also mailed in my taxes. Send me the cheque big Mama - it is going towards Japan. And looking good getting there.

Got word that my QC student loan is going through, that I might even get a bursary and that all my papers are in order for graduation... save a little thing called a thesis but that will be dealt with in Japan (December deadline). Heck! It is a major reason why I even wanted to go in the first place. Along with treasure hunting, of course.

So "the end" to all you to-dos! I have checked the box, crossed you all of twice and am kissing you good-bye. It is now time for the sinking in to start...

Today, my friend D came over to say hello: "I hate you." He is a JET Alternate and I can understand the frustration, the anxiety of everyday hoping an email from the Japanese Consulate would arrive saying that someone else dropped out and you are able to go in their stead. It is not a very nice thing to hope for and yet, I hope it for him! It would be nice to have a friend to do day trips with. I need someone to carry my luggage.

This evening there was a small presentation at school. As I was heading towards the elevators after having said my good-byes and thank yous to my professor, I realized this is probably the last time I will ever walk down a Concordia Hallway as a student. The rest of my degree will be done abroad and ... well, there is something sad about that.

My close friends can attest to the fact that I worked really hard to make up for my reckless/ "I don't give a fuck" attitude during undergrad to get into my Master's in hopes of someday becoming a teacher. And one of the most exciting parts about going back to school was that at McGill I made no new friends. I rarely went to class, didn't join any activities so the fault is mostly mine...  At Concordia, I was looking forward to meeting new people and engaging with them if not befriend them. I did do that! and the sad thing is I probably won't be seeing any of them again in the academic context. For all my bitching about the Ivory Tower, there is this sense of a sacred space - one that I appreciate though perhaps not enough while it was happening.

I guess in a way, this is my first good-bye. My first "the end" before leaving. I would be lying if I wrote I wasn't a little sad. I would also be lying if I wrote I wasn't relieved - school has a certain unique stress that I need to set aside for now.